This post of mine is going to cause a lot of ruckus. I know there will be people who might delete me, and never read another post, and I respect that. To each his own. I’ve wrestled with how to tackle this subject since my first post, and I have put it off, and put it off, because it is so delicate, and there are definitely two very strong sides of the debate.
But, as you know I am a woman. I have a great deal of faith in women to accomplish anything they set their minds to, this includes snagging a man from another woman.
I tell my girls all the time, every single time the subject comes up in fact, that: “You cannot steal a person from another person if they don’t want to go.”
I believe that, completely, entirely and wholeheartedly. I believe, without a shadow of a doubt if a partner is fully content, committed and more than anything built with integrity, not even Angelina Jolie (hot, younger Angelina Jolie, not current, malnourished looking Angelina Jolie)could stand in front of your man naked, and entice him to fuck her if your relationship was solid. I fully believe this to be true of every single man on the planet. IF that man is right in his own head about his personal self esteem, his role in his relationship, and his personal manhood is thriving, he will not cave. I’m not saying he won’t be tempted, or get hard, and WISH and THINK about hopping on her, I’m saying that even if he THINKS it, he won’t ACT on it.
Nobody can be “stolen who doesn’t want to be taken.” Period. End of story.
I’m not talking about fragile men, who only feel good when they’re giving it to somebody who isn’t there significant, committed other. That’s an entirely different animal, that “I CAN’T EVEN” with. Because, seriously, if you know you’re one of those men who needs their ego stroked by a strange woman every single day, then hey, why not just BE SINGLE?? What a concept, right?
Listen, I know you men out there would like to believe that you’re all Casanova. That the smoldering look of lust in your eyes is enough to get us women, to whip off our panties, and give you full access. You might even believe that wining, dining, travel, flattery, presents, and such will also give you the keys to the pleasure vault. I have news for you. Are you sitting down?
If a woman doesn’t want to have sex with you, all your wining, dining, romantic gestures, etc, etc, etc are getting you ABSOLUTELY NOWHERE. Nada. Zip. Zilch.
Women hold the key to you getting laid. That’s the absolute truth. If we don’t want sex, you’re not getting sex.
Which brings me to the point of my post.
If, let’s just say hypothetically, a married, or involved male walks up to woman, and propositions her. Asks her for coffee, drinks, dinner, what have you. If the woman happens to KNOW that the said male is involved with somebody else, the correct, woman/sister code thing for her to do would be to:
a) say “hell no, you think I’m THAT kind of woman” and turn on her heel
b) “My Lord Fabio, you’re so handsome, and wonderful, I’ve been fantasizing about making you mine for years, I cannot believe you’ve finally asked me to commit adultery with you. YES. YES. OF COURSE YES.”
I’m being ridiculous, but obviously you know where I stand. I’m not saying people won’t flirt with people they shouldn’t flirt with, or fantasize about what it might be like with that person you’re crazy, sexually, drawn to. That’s being human. It’s natural. We’re all animals, born to procreate. Sexual attraction is supposed to be there. I’m not condemning that, I’m wondering out loud, if women, would honor a sister code, and vow not to sleep with a man they already know has a wife, would there be no more adultery. Because, seriously, if dudes are fucking around, and fucking up on women like Lady Gaga, and Beyonce?! And if there is no girl code for high profile, forces of nature women like this? Where’s the hope for the rest of us, and our regular Joe husbands??? I mean the bitches that hooked up with Gaga’s fiance Taylor Kinney, and Beyonce’s HUSBAND JayZ, would have had to be shuttled down from fucking Mars, to not know that these two men had women waiting for them at home. Which brings me to Alicia Keys. An artist I was completely obsessed with, thought she too was a force of nature, until she took up with a man who was married, while his wife was something like five or six months pregnant, with their THIRD CHILD. Since then I can’t even stomach her face. I actually find her entire “I’m so feminist, I’m going to walk the red carpets, and perform on world stages sans make up, ridiculous. “Look at all the ways I am just like you.” Oh no you fucking aren’t Alicia. I would not even consider getting in bed with a man who’s WIFE was currently pregnant, no matter how much I desired him, or thought he was “MY ONE.” Put your make up back on, none of this soap boxing you’re doing will make this woman forget what you did, or fill up your karma bank. Please don’t even think about writing me an email telling me how “he was probably unhappy in his marriage” or “maybe she didn’t know.” He was a producer she had worked with. His wife was FIVE OR SIX MONTHS PREGNANT. Does that sound “unhappy” to you??? It doesn’t to me. Just saying.
Where is the loyalty from fellow females? Why is there so little of it? This totally makes me “go hmmm.”
I always tell our daughters: “Don’t be that woman who goes after a man you already know to be spoken for. You might “win” him. He might “pick” you. But in the end, you lose a man the same way you won him.”
And that’s just my two cents, oh yeah, and I’m not high strung, just passionate and opinionated. But thank you for your two cents…