In the spirit of April Fool’s Day, which I for one never celebrated when I was younger, I’m just not a prankster, so I could never give as good as I got it. This led me to always opt out of the “festivities.” I would like to clear something up with all of you. On March 25th, I posted on my Instagram this, what I thought was very tongue in cheek, Kermit the Frog meme.
For those of you who do follow any meme accounts, you know they’re JOKES. They’re meant to be taken very tongue in cheek. Poking fun at our, our being “humankind”, ability to take ourselves way too seriously. Or sometimes they’re making fun of how dumb we can be within our relationships, or how petty we can be in life.
Anyway, I posted the one that went like this:
ME: I should talk to him so we don’t go to bed angry.
INNER ME: Say goodnight, then post on social media so he knows you’re awake.
It was FUNNY. It was saucy, and it was in no way an indication of how I live my relationship with my husband. But, some of you, actually a lot more of you than I could have imagined, wrote me messages with your advice on how to be in my marriage. I know you all meant well, that you’re hearts are totally in the right place, because I feel like I “know” you a little tiny bit after all this time of us “interacting” through my social media, and my website.
But I need to suggest to you, those of you who really gave me quite a lot to chew on. Hit the pause button before you hit the send button. Check in with yourself, reread the post, reread the joke, and then decide if I meant it in jest, or if it really was a “cry for help.” Not so much for me, but for yourselves. I mean, all I was trying to do was give you all a little chuckle for your Tuesday afternoon, I didn’t mean to send you into concern mode, or counselor mode. It was all meant in good fun.
In closing I will say this. I don’t buy into that “never go to sleep angry” mindset, or that you should always “work it out in the moment.” Sometimes it’s not the best idea, if emotions are too high, if feelings are too raw. Sometimes the best thing to do, is simply bite your tongue, agree to disagree, “sleep on it” and 9/10 times I can guarantee you what bothered you the night, or day before, is a thing of the past once you’ve been removed from the heat of conflict, and had a good nights sleep. Coming at upset with a clear, rested mind, in my experience is 1000 TIMES more effective that hashing shit out into the wee hours of the morning. Trust me, I’ve tried that, Yanny Bissony doesn’t do well with that.
But hey, that’s just how we roll. If you are hasher outters, I say whatever works for your relationship is good for you; and you should keep doing what you’re doing. Me, I might stick to my old MO that I never was very good at pranking people.