Over the last few months, actually it has been years that I’ve pondered the merits of social media; but most recently I’ve been giving it more thought on a much deeper level. Asking myself things like:
What am I getting out of it?
Is it, as a whole working toward my well being, whether emotionally, or physically, or is it “taking” from me?
Then I ask these questions:
Am I putting out into social media my best AUTHENTIC self? I say authentic because there are plenty of people posting all about their “best” self and to me that’s not authentic, if you get what I’m saying.
I wonder, daily, if being on social media really is a necessary evil to building a brand, to getting “the job” and “getting that book deal?” Does it actually even matter? So far I have to respond to this with a resounding NO. Being on social media for close to 18 months now I can honestly say that nobody is beating down my door to publish my books, or, give me that parenting talk show that I dream about having. This was the only reason I started social media accounts in the first place, because to be honest with all of you I find most of it to be either completely self serving narcissistic bullshit, or, totally and utterly depressing, with a small sprinkle of inspiration from time to time. But one has to really dig around for the good shit as far as I’m concerned. Meanwhile I feel like I’m wading around in an ocean of complete nonsense looking for that one pearl in the mouth of a swine.
My blog falls under my daily therapy. This is sort of like if I were to have a journal. I say journal because they tend to be a bit more “open for business” than a diary is, for example. We used to have to journal daily for English class for as long as I can remember, but we never turned in our diaries. No. Those were for our eyes only. A place to share your deepest fears, insecurities, and dreams. These are private. My blog is not. I write on here everyday the same things I would confidently shout from a megaphone in a crowded room of strangers and regret nothing. Not one word. Which is why, a YouTube video that I came across the other day has truly stayed with me in the most alarming way that I cannot even begin to understand why the person posted it. Like for the life of me I don’t get it. It doesn’t make me go “hmmm” friends it actually is still making me ask myself, DAYS LATER, WTAF was this person thinking. I mean this Vlog was some serious diary purging. Meaning I get being in the absolute pits of life, I understand the deep insecurity of having not a nickel to rub together when you have a family, when you’ve purchased a house and your partners job gets snatched out from under him.
Been there done that, go the t-shirt. I’ve lived it, sadly more times than I can count. It’s not fun. It’s horrifying and it is undeniably one of the worst things that can happen to a mother of three young kids. It isn’t the end of life, or the WORST thing that can happen, but it is way up there, and I respect that. But. There is a time and place to share the fact that you’re robbing from Peter to pay Paul, and in my humble wife opinion that time is over many glasses of wine, crying with your best friends. NOT ON YOUR YOUTUBE channel.
I mean, how does one’s husband hold his head up high going out for job interviews when the interviewee knows he needs the job as much as he needs the oxygen in the air to breath? I can tell you, he doesn’t go there confidently knowing that anybody who wants to know how between a rock and a hard place he really is just has to google his wife. I just can’t even. Not for any good reason would I ever let anybody who I don’t trust with the lives of my children about my financial situation. And I have Barbie Springfield to thank for this. Many, many years ago when I was a young, mouthy wife/mother in my early twenties yammering away about every single thing that went through my head, my bestie, gently and with absolute love shared this nugget with me: “When you tell too many people the things that are sacred between you and Yannick, you invite not only some people’s joy into your marriage, but you also invite their envy and jealousy. The more you talk, the more of your power you give away; the less you give away the more you keep.”
I haven’t always been great at that, but I can truly say that her telling me that changed how/what I share about my lover, my partner, my man with “just anybody.” I sure as hell wouldn’t be caught dead, yammering away on my YouTube channel about our finances. If I were a friend of this particular person I would give her the exact same advice my bestie did years ago, and then I would tell her to wipe that Vlog from her channel quicker than quick. The sad thing is I like her husband, and would never in a million years have thought he was “so close to the edge of financial ruin” by looking at him. Now I know that and too much more about him. I truly wish him, her and their young family all the blessings of finding another job sooner rather than later. Maybe if she deletes that post, and has some solid chats with the universe the angels might just respond in her favor.