Count me confused. Like I’m so totally baffled by modern culture, by this new form of “I’m just being honest” that allows people to feel that spewing hate, and shit out of their mouths against other human beings, is OK.
It’s not even close to ok. What happened to “fighting fair”??? Where did that simple practice go? How did the internet/social media become a safe haven for bullying, for hatred, for using your vocabulary to hurt, in some cases decimate a person you don’t even know?
Seriously though, how did this happen? When did it happen? Why did it happen?
It makes me “go hmmm” all the time.
I also wonder if these hate spewers hit send/post, sit back arms crossed behind their heads, rock back and forth and think; “yeah, that was good. I’m f’n awesome.” No you are not awesome. In fact, you are the exact opposite of awesome, you are a shitty human being. Or dumb. Or both. They must be, since I cannot fathom that any intelligent, sensitive, decent, loving person would ever ruthlessly attack a stranger so vilely with their words, unprovoked, if they had the slightest understanding about the power of those words.
I was bullied in school. A lot. It may have been because I had blonde hair, and looked a certain way to them, I guess I displeased them to the point where they thought it was all right to Coke my locker. Or write slut on it with lipstick. But if any of you are out there, reading this, you need to know you didn’t break me, and you should tell your children, if you ever had any, that they should never, ever behave in this way, under any circumstance. The dislike toward me was so strong, that a group of graduates listed me as their pet peeve in the yearbook, I still have that yearbook. It serves as a reminder to me that I need to bring up my daughters in a manner where they would never go out into the world, and be those types of people. By raising them in this way, I ensure that they, and I, will rear their children to become people who do not become a cog in the wheel of society’s cruelty. I may be just one person, but I can impact many people if I always remember the power of my words. Thanks in large part to what happened to me, and being married to a human who only ever, “fights fair”, I choose my own words carefully when I’m angry. Or when I feel I’m right. Or when I don’t like somebody. Or agree with their point of view. Or more importantly, when I’m dealing with somebody who is so vastly different from me, that for whatever reason, it may cause me to forget that they too feel pain, as I do.
Last night I finally, at long last got around to watching the documentary, from 2011, BULLY. I had wanted to see it when it originally came out, but our youngest was in the middle of a terrible situation at school, so I felt like we were basically living it, why did I also need to watch it. If you haven’t seen it yet, do. It will change the way you treat everybody in your life, I guarantee it. The reason I wanted to watch it yesterday, was primarily due to wanting to sort out, within myself, if what was happening to Taylor Swift, was, as some people were yelling on social media, bullying, and the victimization of an innocent, young woman. After watching that film, and reliving my own teen years, because of it, I have to say with absolute conviction that no, I feel as though Taylor Swift is not a victim in this situation. She has built an empire on attacking, smearing, calling out those she felt wronged her for a decade. She has called it “art/therapy/creative licence”. Kayne has done the same, and now he’s a woman hater? This is the one time where I feel like Taylor needs to sit down, and if anything, she should apologize for dragging Kayne through the mud via her Grammy speech earlier this year. She is not a victim. She is not being bullied. I suggest she, and all her friends have a PJ party, watch the powerful film BULLY, and come face to face with what true bullying looks like. Then rethink their strategy as to how they’re going to deal with the mess she’s made. What I believe is happening to Taylor is more of the; “you reap what you sow” business.
Bullying is what happened to the brilliant, funny, talented, and brave Leslie Jones yesterday on Twitter, and should serve to remind us all, that our words, our intent, our emboldened anonymity can destroy even the strongest person. Even they have their breaking point. And to be the person who is capable of sending somebody innocent, and wonderful to their breaking point, is not an accomplishment. It is a disgrace. It is shameful. It is uncalled for. It is bullying.
I see a trend happening in our modern world, that has been growing like a plague, a desensitization of an entire generation. Actually I take that back, it isn’t just young people who spew hate at innocent strangers, it’s affecting all ages, in all walks of life regardless of race, religion, or socio-economic background and it’s puzzling to me, as to why? What do people gain from their vileness? I sort of get it; listen we can’t all agree, we don’t all have the same taste in movies, clothes, food, beauty, books, politicians, music, etc, etc, etc. That’s ok. In fact that’s actually awesome. It’s what makes the world an interesting place to explore, be, and enjoy. We all differ in our opinions of everything under the sun. That’s natural, that’s normal. You know what isn’t f’n normal? Is attacking somebody’s skin colour, or threatening their lives on social media when just because you didn’t like somebody’s movie. WTAF? I feel this way, and I know Leslie Jones feels this way: if you don’t like me, don’t follow me, it’s as easy as that. If you don’t like my writing, don’t read it, that’s cool too. If you don’t find me attractive, or intelligent or “worth your time” I respect that, time is a precious commodity, just don’t be hateful. Ever.
Because, where is the good in hate???
At the end of the day, we’re really all one, aren’t we? We all bleed red. We all put our pants on one leg at a time. We all want our lives to be the best they can be. We want love. We want to give love. We leave the same way we got here, with nothing, “you can’t take it with you when you go”, so why not leave it all here now, in love.
Because we all know there’s plenty of good in that.